They chose a diversion program for my mom. Which is handy on the one aspect that I don’t have to go through the stress of an actual trial, and disappointing on the other that she gets away with it. The one time she gets caught after a lifetime of abuse, and she still gets away with it like nothing happened at all. Six months of an online course teaching her more tactics to toss in her arsenal of manipulation. Supposedly an anger management course, and then we’re back to square one with the aside that now when everything is said and done she’ll be all about trying to get my “forgiveness” and saying how “blessed” she is that God answers her prayers, and help her poor daughter who struggles with anger… Etc etc etc narcissist bullshit.
In the end the diversion really was the best choice for everyone, so I’m not upset with the fact it was chosen in my particular case. I’m upset that something like these diversion programs exist at all. In my case I’m already outside the realm of abuse. I’ve escaped with my safety and sanity intact. Even after the court ordered no contact is lifted and she can start hounding me I have the ability to say no and ignore her. I’ll be fine.
Others, who suffer domestic abuse aren’t always so lucky. The diversion only gives them a reprieve for a while until it gets a million times worse on the return. Women (and men really) with abusive spouses aren’t always able to escape the way I did, and once the diversion is complete the, charges are dropped, and if they survive the next time to call the police they’re right back to square one. This is a HORRIBLE idea. At least in the cases of true abuse.
Now on the flip side, a diversion can be a good thing in regards to those falsely accused of abuse, after defending themselves. Such as myself. Basically because I hulk smashed after my fight or flight response kicked in, if we had gone to trial it would have opened Pandora’s Box digging into all aspects of my past.
So… I guess in the end the greater good did prevail, or put off the inevitable for six more months… Guess we have to wait and see.