This Makes it Worth the Struggle

2016 was a rough year for us, for so many reasons, but it ended on a high note with Hubs in town visiting for the weekend. I was so happy to have my family all together under one roof again, and the kids were ecstatic. Little B1 whom I’ve been worried about since he fell ill at the beginning of December immediately bounced back to his former Wild Child self as soon as he laid eyes on Hubs. All of the kids just brightened right up, and it made me realize that depression is an ailment not limited by age or understanding.

Saturday we went out and enjoyed a meal together as a family and Hubs spent the majority of the evening on the floor playing with the kids. Things that kids are supposed to do with their dad.


It helped me relax a whole bunch too. I got three nights of natural, un-aided sleep, which I so very desperately needed after the past month. Sleep with a sedative is one thing, sleep because your body rthyms are working correctly is another. I still can’t really get over how much better I feel on these meds either. I never really felt BAD before, but slowing my brain down a few notches has really helped with my over all moods. I have much more patience with the Littles, and I’m able to focus on tasks again. Well mostly… I’ve lost a little bit of my sharpness during the adjustment phase, but hopefully that will all level itself out here in the next two weeks as I completely acclimate.

I’m just so relieved to be starting this year on a good note. I think this is the first year I haven’t felt some impending dread over the coming year in a really long time. There are a lot of things on the horizon that I’m anticipating, but instead of facing them with apprehension and fear I’m ready to challenge them head on. I guess I feel kind of like I got my spitfire back after a long spiritual beat down. Idk… I’m having a little bit of trouble coming up with the words to describe it. It’s good. It’s all good.