Suicide Prevention Day

Today is a weird day for me emotionally. There are a million reasons why, most of which are far too complicated to get into here in the limited few moments I have to write between wrangling the Littles.

I’ve been so low to the point where I wanted to end my own life a total of three times. The first most severe, when I was eighteen. Someone stepped up and saved my life that day, which lead to a domino effect of amazing growth in my life, and eventually my diagnosis of PTSD. To commemorate that event, I went out of the way and got this tattoo. It’s on my wrist to remind me that even when I feel that there isn’t anyone out there who understands me, my disorder over whelms me, or I just get tired of all the stresses in life: I’m worth it. I’m more than the symptoms of my disorder, or labels people assign to me. I might have “lost my mind” so to speak, but in the process I have found my soul. Something that is so much more complex and beautiful than anything that appears on the surface.

Life, even in all it’s imperfections, and ugliness is worth living. Don’t ever forget that.

This link provides international numbers for suicide hotlines. Please, if you are feeling suicidal at any point, reach out to someone. You are not alone.

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