A Very Long Month

Today is my last day at the gym until I complete my postpartum recovery. I’m estimating with all of the holidays on the horizon as well as two new Littles, returning some time in January. It would be awesome if I could get back before then, but I’m not going to push my luck.

One day of sitting at home with nothing to do yesterday about did me in. I want to do so many things, but my body just can’t handle it any more. I can’t even sit or bend for more than a few moments at a time before something starts to hurt somewhere. Which means not only do I have to give up my beloved lifting, I’m unable to do my chores or really play with my Little as well. I’m not on doctor ordered bed rest, but I don’t feel like doing much aside from sprawling out in bed either. 

My mom is coming up to stay with us on the 11th until I’m back on my feet after the delivery, so my house won’t fall apart around me and the current Little won’t feel neglected. She isn’t neglected at all now, I am able to take care of her basic toddler needs, but she doesn’t understand why I can’t get down on the floor and play with her, or why I can’t sit in her bed to read bed time stories right now and she feels emotionally insecure. Well, at least she’s exhibiting emotionally insecure behaviors. We do talk about how she feels as much as her three year old comprehension goes, but it’s mostly just sort of mimicking whatever I suggest or a frustrated garble of words she tries to express but simply can’t right now.

Poor kid has had the worst time this week dealing with the absence of our living room rug, which got sent out for cleaning. I don’t know what I’m going to do when the Twins arrive. Even though I’ve tried to prepare her as much as I could, she’s going to have a difficult time adjusting. I think that might be the root of her problems now. The fact that she can sense the change on the horizon.

It’s not that she’s acting OUT either. She has just been very literally clingy, and constantly asks me and Hubs if we know where she is, even when she’s sitting right in front of us. Her little world is changing, and I think she’s feeling a little lost in all of it. I wish there was more I could do to help her, but I can’t think of anything else I could possibly be doing aside from those things my physical limitations prevent. 

It’s going to be a very long month. There is no other way around it. The massive change in our routine, my hormones raging unchecked by physical activity, my poor Little trying to understand what all is happening/about to happen, all culminating in an epic explosion of new baby responsibility. Thank God, for therapy. Lol.