Tightrope Walking

I was relaxing on the couch last night, minding my own business, watching some X-Files right after my Little had gone to sleep. It was just a normal Wednesday night until I got up to head to the bathroom and saw one of the worst sights a pregnant woman could see. Completely out of the blue entirely with out pain I started bleeding. Not spotting, but BLEEDING. Being a “pro” at the miscarriage game, I immediately called Hubs to come home from work and we rushed to the ER. I knew heading in if I was about to miscarry there was nothing they could do, but I wanted to know. I didn’t want to wait around in limbo until today when my OB’s office is open, I wanted to know if something had happened to my babies.

So there we sat in the ER while they ran all sorts of tests before the ultrasound tech arrived. It was quite possibly the worst three hours of my life, but it ended on a relatively good note. They found both babies, measuring normally with strong heart beats, but they also found the bleeding which is in the best possible place for random bleeding I guess. It’s coming from my uterin wall and not the gestational sacs, but it still doesn’t mean everything will be okay. 

I’m waiting curled up in bed afraid to move until my OB is in the office so I can call for a follow up appointment. The bleeding has all but stopped, another good sign, but I am still a frazzled hot mess this morning. I don’t know what’s worse. Going to the OB expecting to see a baby and seeing an empty sac, or meeting my babies and watching them grow on the verge of possibly losing them. 

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