Mundane

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That right there is about the most exciting thing that’s happened to me over the past week. My Rogue order arrived in the mail today, just in time for my one year Crossfit anniversary. *confetti cannon* It’s better than Christmas I tell you!!

Erm… What else has been going on? I had to do the absolute most awkward assignment to control my flashbacks. It was effective but I felt like an adolescent sneaking into an x rated movie. Lol. I’ve been having issues since my miscarriage with intimacy with my husband. Every time we were together I would have intense flashbacks of my sexual assaults and memories of other partners. Not necessarily bad memories, it was just a whole lot and emotionally I couldn’t deal with it. Thank you PTSD.

So anyway, I was supposed to write down each memory in the hopes of triggering a psychological process of releasing the memories and returning me to the present. Yeah. That’s right. I had to write down memories of my intimate moments with other partners, and at the advice of my therapist haven’t yet told my husband. MOST AWKWARD THING EVER. It worked. I haven’t had any trouble since writing everything down, but yeah… I don’t even know what to do with them. My memories I mean. Usually all my therapy stuff ends up here so I can keep a log of it, but this is a familyish blog folks. Can’t be writing that sort of thing here.

Anyway…. So yeah. Nothing really blog worthy has happened. I feel kind of bad getting all gung-ho back into the swing of things then totally dropping off the face of the Earth. Blogging just hasn’t been the same since I came back from my break. I’m not sure what that means. I don’t know if my focus is suffering, or if I just need to get back into the groove. It was difficult to get in the habit of writing every day when I started, perhaps I just need to try to write daily again. Even if the posts are crappy. We’ll see.